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Phox I post too much
Reputation: 110
Joined: 11 Nov 2008 Posts: 2034
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Posted: Thu Apr 26, 2012 7:51 pm Post subject: Anon delivers |
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>Professor : You are a Christian, aren’t you, son?
>Student : Yes, sir.
>Professor: So, you believe in GOD ?
>Student : Absolutely, sir.
>Professor : Is GOD good ?
>Student : Sure.
>Professor: Is GOD all powerful ?
>Student : Yes.
>Professor: My brother died of cancer even though he prayed to GOD to heal him. Most of us would attempt to help others who are ill. But GOD didn’t. How is this GOD good then? Hmm?
>(Student was silent.)
>Professor: You can’t answer, can you ? Let’s start again, young fella. Is GOD good?
>Student : Yes.
>Professor: Is satan good ?
>Student : No.
>Professor: Where does satan come from ?
>Student : From … GOD …
>Professor: That’s right. Tell me son, is there evil in this world?
>Student : Yes.
>Professor: Evil is everywhere, isn’t it ? And GOD did make everything. Correct?
>Student : Yes.
>Professor: So who created evil ?
>(Student did not answer.)
>Professor: Is there sickness? Immorality? Hatred? Ugliness? All these terrible things exist in the world, don’t they?
>Student : Yes, sir.
>Professor: So, who created them ?
>(Student had no answer.)
>Professor: Science says you have 5 Senses you use to identify and observe the world around you. Tell me, son, have you ever seen GOD?
>Student : No, sir.
>Professor: Tell us if you have ever heard your GOD?
>Student : No , sir.
>Professor: Have you ever felt your GOD, tasted your GOD, smelt your GOD? Have you ever had any sensory perception of GOD for that matter?
>Student : No, sir. I’m afraid I haven’t.
>Professor: Yet you still believe in Him?
>Student : Yes.
>Professor : According to Empirical, Testable, Demonstrable Protocol, Science says your GOD doesn’t exist. What do you say to that, son?
>Student : Nothing. I only have my faith.
>Professor: Yes, faith. And that is the problem Science has.
>Student : Professor, is there such a thing as heat?
>Professor: Yes.
>Student : And is there such a thing as cold?
>Professor: Yes.
>Student : No, sir. There isn’t.
>(The lecture theatre became very quiet with this turn of events.)
>Student : Sir, you can have lots of heat, even more heat, superheat, mega heat, white heat, a little heat or no heat. But we don’t have anything called cold. We can hit 458 degrees below zero which is no heat, but we can’t go any further after that. There is no such thing as cold. Cold is only a word we use to describe the absence of heat. We cannot measure cold. Heat is energy. Cold is not the opposite of heat, sir, just the absence of it.
>(There was pin-drop silence in the lecture theater.)
>Student : What about darkness, Professor? Is there such a thing as darkness?
>Professor: Yes. What is night if there isn’t darkness?
>Student : You’re wrong again, sir. Darkness is the absence of something. You can have low light, normal light, bright light, flashing light. But if you have no light constantly, you have nothing and its called darkness, isn’t it? In reality, darkness isn’t. If it is, were you would be able to make darkness darker, wouldn’t you?
>Professor: So what is the point you are making, young man ?
>Student : Sir, my point is your philosophical premise is flawed.
>Professor: Flawed ? Can you explain how?
>Student : Sir, you are working on the premise of duality. You argue there is life and then there is death, a good GOD and a bad GOD. You are viewing the concept of GOD as something finite, something we can measure. Sir, Science can’t even explain a thought. It uses electricity and magnetism, but has never seen, much less fully understood either one. To view death as the opposite of life is to be ignorant of the fact that death cannot exist as a substantive thing.
>Death is not the opposite of life: just the absence of it. Now tell me, Professor, do you teach your students that they evolved from a monkey?
>Professor: If you are referring to the natural evolutionary process, yes, of course, I do.
>Student : Have you ever observed evolution with your own eyes, sir?
>(The Professor shook his head with a smile, beginning to realize where the argument was going.)
>Student : Since no one has ever observed the process of evolution at work and cannot even prove that this process is an on-going endeavor. Are you not teaching your opinion, sir? Are you not a scientist but a preacher?
>(The class was in uproar.)
>Student : Is there anyone in the class who has ever seen the Professor’s brain?
>(The class broke out into laughter. )
>Student : Is there anyone here who has ever heard the Professor’s brain, felt it, touched or smelt it? No one appears to have done so. So, according to the established Rules of Empirical, Stable, Demonstrable Protocol, Science says that you have no brain, sir. With all due respect, sir, how do we then trust your lectures, sir?
>(The room was silent. The Professor stared at the student, his face unfathomable.)
>Professor: I guess you’ll have to take them on faith, son.
>Student : That is it sir … Exactly ! The link between man & GOD is FAITH. That is all that keeps things alive and moving.
>P.S.
>I believe you have enjoyed the conversation. And if so, you’ll probably want your friends / colleagues to enjoy the same, won’t you?
>Forward this to increase their knowledge … or FAITH.
>By the way, that student was George W. Bush.
Last edited by Phox on Thu Apr 26, 2012 10:57 pm; edited 1 time in total |
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Cryoma Member of the Year
Reputation: 198
Joined: 14 Jan 2009 Posts: 1819
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Posted: Thu Apr 26, 2012 8:06 pm Post subject: |
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The professor was stupid to give in so easily.
"You are hearing my words, yes?
You see my mouth move in conjunction?
You are directly experiencing my speech, and I directly tell you that it is a result of the thought process of my brain.
Since you have never seen or heard directly from god, he cannot say the same."
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r34p3r Grandmaster Cheater Supreme
Reputation: 3
Joined: 05 Jul 2007 Posts: 1368 Location: Australia
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Posted: Thu Apr 26, 2012 8:11 pm Post subject: |
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The argument is clearly established so as to end in favour of the student. Any half-decent professor would have pointed out that you can measure both cold and darkness. Just because you measure something in terms of another thing does not mean that it does not exist. Darkness is a lack of light. Light is wavelengths perceivable by eyes. An absence of varying degrees depending how dark or how light it is.
I've not presented my point well but this is the internet and I just want to get the idea out there, even if the original poster is trying to incite argument.
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..... Expert Cheater
Reputation: 59
Joined: 23 Oct 2010 Posts: 118
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Posted: Thu Apr 26, 2012 8:13 pm Post subject: |
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I would have punched the faggot in the face and said "Oh my bad I thought God had your back on that one." and then I would have laughed with the rest of the class at that faggot.
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shitposter Newbie cheater
Reputation: 5
Joined: 12 Nov 2008 Posts: 13
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Posted: Thu Apr 26, 2012 8:18 pm Post subject: |
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This is stupid.
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Barnold Swolezzenegger Cheater
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Joined: 12 Mar 2011 Posts: 45
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Posted: Thu Apr 26, 2012 8:31 pm Post subject: |
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Funny, I read this on Reddit last week and it said it was said by Einstein..
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[SPW]Killamoocow Master Cheater
Reputation: 30
Joined: 07 Nov 2007 Posts: 439 Location: Secret Cow Level
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Posted: Thu Apr 26, 2012 8:50 pm Post subject: |
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_________________
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br0l0ck Cheater
Reputation: 63
Joined: 15 Aug 2007 Posts: 38
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Posted: Thu Apr 26, 2012 9:00 pm Post subject: |
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Apotheoun wrote: | Funny, I read this on Reddit last week and it said it was said by Einstein.. | it was also posted here last week, why does no one remember?
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Evil_Intentions Expert Cheater
Reputation: 65
Joined: 07 Jan 2010 Posts: 214
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Posted: Thu Apr 26, 2012 9:27 pm Post subject: |
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Brolock wrote: | Apotheoun wrote: | Funny, I read this on Reddit last week and it said it was said by Einstein.. | it was also posted here last week, why does no one remember? |
I do, figured it was one of those things everyone understood and so acted like it was new. A mass joke of subtlety that you ruined.
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AverageAzn247 Grandmaster Cheater
Reputation: 34
Joined: 01 Oct 2007 Posts: 909 Location: Austin,TX with 72 virgins
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Posted: Thu Apr 26, 2012 9:33 pm Post subject: |
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[SPW]Killamoocow wrote: |  | alsum.
_________________
Waxxup wrote: | What are Night Elves?
A girl group? |
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Phox I post too much
Reputation: 110
Joined: 11 Nov 2008 Posts: 2034
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Posted: Thu Apr 26, 2012 9:55 pm Post subject: |
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r34p3r wrote: | The argument is clearly established so as to end in favour of the student. Any half-decent professor would have pointed out that you can measure both cold and darkness. Just because you measure something in terms of another thing does not mean that it does not exist. Darkness is a lack of light. Light is wavelengths perceivable by eyes. An absence of varying degrees depending how dark or how light it is.
I've not presented my point well but this is the internet and I just want to get the idea out there, even if the original poster is trying to incite argument. | No, you're definitely right, it's funny because of the end, "George Bush was the student"
Yes brolock, I remember when someone posted it here.
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br0l0ck Cheater
Reputation: 63
Joined: 15 Aug 2007 Posts: 38
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Posted: Thu Apr 26, 2012 9:59 pm Post subject: |
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Kazekeil wrote: | Brolock wrote: | Apotheoun wrote: | Funny, I read this on Reddit last week and it said it was said by Einstein.. | it was also posted here last week, why does no one remember? |
I do, figured it was one of those things everyone understood and so acted like it was new. A mass joke of subtlety that you ruined. | No. anyone that says they remember is lying, I brought it up first so I am the only one who remembers
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the the the Master Cheater
Reputation: 46
Joined: 15 Jun 2008 Posts: 429
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Posted: Thu Apr 26, 2012 10:14 pm Post subject: |
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this is fucking DUMB
professor is not getting schooled
cold is a thing, it IS the absence of heat, he have a definition of COLD and DARK
>>Student : Have you ever observed evolution with your own eyes, sir?
Yes, everytime anything is born
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r34p3r Grandmaster Cheater Supreme
Reputation: 3
Joined: 05 Jul 2007 Posts: 1368 Location: Australia
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Posted: Fri Apr 27, 2012 8:50 am Post subject: |
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asciicat wrote: | this is fucking DUMB
professor is not getting schooled
cold is a thing, it IS the absence of heat, he have a definition of COLD and DARK
>>Student : Have you ever observed evolution with your own eyes, sir?
Yes, everytime anything is born |
Birth is not evolution, learn to science good.
If you instead think that us being born is evidence of evolution then you should also do the aforementioned thing.
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Igor Expert Cheater
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Joined: 04 Apr 2012 Posts: 145
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You cannot post new topics in this forum You cannot reply to topics in this forum You cannot edit your posts in this forum You cannot delete your posts in this forum You cannot vote in polls in this forum You cannot attach files in this forum You can download files in this forum
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